Monday, February 13, 2012


Okay.  My last post was supposed to be the last one on this blog, as it was titled "Moving On."  However, since that post, I've had two biopsies and am currently awaiting the results from the second one on Wednesday from the oncologist.

In debating whether or not I should even post on this blog I considered the possibility that cancer will never be completely separate from my family and my every day life.  However, I do hope that my specific experience with cancer and all the crappy stuff that goes with it can help someone else, and that someone may not want to read about my every day life.  And, I really don't want to detract from posts about my family or my kids by posting about me and being sick.   I would hate for them to look back on our family "album" and only see depressing stories of being sick.  It's kind of nice for me actually, to have a place where I can document everything, and then push it out of my mind.

So, back to the health issue.  In August 2011 I had a "dirty" PET scan.  The docs thought it could be cancer, but might be an infection my body was fighting off.  So we waited 6 weeks.  In October, another dirty scan, so we decided on biopsy number  3, under the right armpit, to see what was going on.  The node came back non-cancerous, but I was told it still could be, especially since they had such a small piece (1cm node).  Great answer huh?  So it's not cancer, but it could be.  Huh?  So let's wait another 3 months!

Christmas came and went, had a wonderful time with family and really enjoyed being in Utah.

January comes and another dirty scan.  But this time, there's more activity, and they want to go into the chest cavity to take out a "golf ball sized" part of the Thymus that is quite swollen.  Okay, so another simple biopsy right??  Um, no.  This is what I had done:
    Left Mini Thoracotomy
    Anterior Mediastinal Dissection
    Frozen Section
    Pericardial Patch
Yeah, do you even understand those words??  Obviously I didn't, which is why I had the doctor write them down for me! :)

I was in the hospital for 3 nights with a tube hanging out of my ribs to drain the area around my heart.  And because I was hooked to a tube on one side and an IV on the other, I had no privacy (those hospital gowns might not be so bad if they covered 1/2 as much and were as comfortable as a Snuggie...)  Well, I don't need to go into all of the details, especially the ones surrounding the pulling/yanking of the tube out of my chest and that being the creepiest grossest feeling ever...  I'm out now!  Made it home about 4PM.  I can barely breath and I'm in some pain but happier than being in the hospital that's for sure!

Not bad huh?  I think it will heal quite nicely!

I should hopefully get some results on Wednesday.  The docs now think it's "almost certainly" cancer and the scans look "highly suspicious" for cancer recurrence.  Of course I would rather hear that it's not cancer, or it might not be cancer, but I am really sick of WAITING for an answer.  I hope they can tell me one way or the other.  


  1. We still appreciate your updates! I am sad you & your family are still entwined in this trial- but I am always glad to know when to send extra prayers and hugs your way.

  2. I recently saw your Mormon and was awed and inspired by your fighting spirit! I'm praying for you. You are beautiful and have a wonderful family worth fighting for! God speed Sister!!!

  3. You are absolutely beautiful. I came across your Mormon ad and then went to your blog from a link (from USU Colors for Tessa race). Anyway, you are inspiring and strong and have a gorgeous smile. I can't even fathom what you are going through, at least till this very last post I read. Never in my life, have I heard of someone having had a thoracotomy, till reading about you (in conjunction with all of your other things on that list, this stood out to me). I had a thoracotomy as a result of a car accident many years ago and when you described having the tubes yanked out, I immmediately relived my experience. Stay strong - Be strong, Many prayers for you -- Colette